Maturity by Dr. A.R Bernard

Subject: Maturity

Four things that God wants from men:
Four things that women want from men:
Four things that men struggle with:
Four things that people want from their leaders:
Decisiveness, Consistency, Strength & Maturity


– Language must be learned and given
– Language is critical to *understanding*
– Just because your _intuition_ understand something, your _language_ needs to be able to deliver that *understanding*

■ Accept RESPONSIBILITY from your motivations and misdoings (what he says, thinks, motives, actions, & attitudes)
– Maturity in this area is not something that  grows by age. It begins with the acceptance of responsibility
DECORUM: being aware of how to conduct in any situation ( especially under-pressure)

When a man is acting like adolescence, you have just asked your wife to be your mother -ARB

what you say, think, motivated with, actions, & attitudes marks the transformational & transitions of a true leader.

When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me.
1 Corinthians 13:11 NIV
– this is what Paul embedded while he is talking about LOVE
– in other words, how you love (& experience the love of God) depends on the way you say, think, motivated with, actions, & attitudes
#Language #Thought #Reasoning

Leadership will have followers and mentors
– your maturity as a leader will shape how your followers say, think, motivated with, actions, & attitudes
– your maturity as a leader depend on who you put as mentors in your life to affect the way you say, think, motivated with, actions, & attitudes
—– How you mature,then, will determine how you adapt to change as a leader

SEE MORE : Entrepreneur or Career?

Leadership must have a unique balance that is almost *paradoxical* in terms of the relationship to the people that you lead.
– Balance always speak of 2/more items in different angles to be balanced

“Blessed are the *poor* (& in need of Him) in spirit, for *theirs* is the kingdom of heaven.
Matthew 5:3 NIV
#PoorInSpirit #RealizedOfTheirNeedOfGod
– People that have come and follow you already realized that they need you (Read: God essentially)
– in other words, they realize they need _someone_ to help them/guide them to find God

When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.
Matthew 9:36 NIV
– people come with baggage but they do not understand how *much* help do they need
– as a leader, he needs to manage his *expectations* at best.
#UnresolvedIssues #IssuesThatTheyAreWillingToOpenUp #IssuesTheyAreNotWillingTo #LackUnderstanding #WantChange #SeekLeadership #LookingForAnswers #LevelOfLife #TheAnswerThatActuallyOkayToBeHeard

Give me *wisdom* and *knowledge*, that I may *_lead_* this people, for who is able to govern this great *people* of yours?”
2 Chronicles 1:10 NIV
KJV: wisdom to go in & out from among your people #WhatALeaderSupposedToDo #Decorum #LeadIn #LeadDetached

I will rescue you from your own people and from the Gentiles. I am sending you to them to open their eyes and turn them from darkness to light, and from the power of Satan to God, so that they may receive forgiveness of sins and a place among those who are sanctified by faith in me.’
Acts 26:17-18 NIV
#PaulMission #ChristianLeader

We have tendency to either *intellectualize* or *spiritualize* their problems (darkness & issues in life) #RealityOfLeaderships
– recognize how you (& the people) react to problems!

They dress the wound of my people *as-though* it were not serious. ‘Peace, peace,’ they say, when there is no peace.
Jeremiah 6:14 NIV #DenialIssues

#Projecting #CognitiveDistortion
– Adam projected his leadership flaws to Eve #IDontWantToBeResponsible #IAmNotTheLeader
– as the leader, Adam was given an opportunity to take responsibility but he did not. He was hiding.
#IwouldntBeHere #IfNotBecauseOfYou
#YouCantHelpSomeone #HeThinksYouAreTheProblem

••••••••• The Balance required of a leader••••••••
– Going in: Rapport
– Going out: detachment
– Build relationship & trust #Rapport
– detach yourself from their personal baggage, interest, ambition & anxiety #ManageExpectations

You cannot lead people that you are afraid of and the one that he’s bounded into -ARB

Imbalance will create the image of *lack-of-concern* (detachment) or *unfairness* (rapport)

So I said, ‘Who are You, Lord?’ And He said, ‘I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting. But rise and stand on your feet; for I have appeared to you for this purpose, to make you a minister and a witness both of the things which you have seen and of the things which I will yet reveal to you. I will *deliver* *you* *from* the *Jewish* people, as well as from the *Gentiles*, to whom I now send you, to open their eyes, in order to turn them from darkness to light, and from the power of Satan to God, that they may receive forgiveness of sins and an inheritance among those who are sanctified by faith in Me.’
Acts 26:15-18 NKJV
To be useful to be the very people that you will lead, you have to be *free* from that very people as well -ARB #Rapport #Detachment
– all truth is always confrontational
– the people will need time to be confronted
– when they do, you need the full freedom and power to be able to do so

Most of Paul’s injuries in ministry come from the people that he is called to serve. This is the challenge of every leader -ARB
– instead of being discouraged, be encouraged of the deliverance that is given by God Himself




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